


Everybody Breaks

by mrsvc



Category: The Big Bang Theory
Genre: Angst, Break Up, F/M, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-01-23
Updated: 2010-01-23
Packaged: 2017-10-06 14:53:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,229
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/54875
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mrsvc/pseuds/mrsvc
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Fool, you made the girl fall in love</p>
            </blockquote>





	Everybody Breaks

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by Gavin DeGraw's "Glass" (song in italics not mine.)

 

      _Fool you made the girl fall in love _

_you said those beautiful things _

_ she thought you spoke things you mean_

"I love you." The words had been so easy for him that first night. Like this was it, he had found her. She smiled against this cheek as he whispered these things to her.

"You're beautiful."

"Forever."

"I promise." And she believed him. Because he was different. Because he wouldn't lie like the others.

_ Caress her skin like it's glass _

_she hears your voice making plans _

_and sees your face in her hands_  

She made love to him. She didn't sleep with him. She didn't do him. She didn't have sex with him. She made love to him. And it felt like he made love her. He held her softly. It wasn't in an alcoholic haze or rough and quick. It was slow and right and together. And afterward, he smiled into her neck and told her about how he had plans for them to go to a bed and breakfast next weekend when Sheldon was at the conference and how someday they would move to a nicer apartment away from prying eyes and anal-retentive Texans. 

_You don't wanna see somebody beg_

_ as you feel her heart surrender you begin to fall _  

She knows it bad when he takes her to some physics conference party deal and she doesn't even heave some long-suffering sigh. She threw on a pretty dress and stood by the man she was quickly falling for. And when he puffed himself up like a little peacocks for all his colleagues, she smiled and felt proud that she was something worth showing off. She'd been arm candy before but she'd never felt worth something. He always made her feel like she was worth something. 

_How do you say that something's through when it never even started_

_ at least not for you_  

As time wore on, the pretty words stopped. She would snuggle up to him on her couch and whisper "I love you" in his ear and he hesitated. It just a fraction of a second, but she heard it. Every time. She heard that slight "uh" before the pretty words. And then they sounded hollow. Eventually, she stopped saying the words to start with. Because she didn't want a parrot, she wanted a man.  

_You breathe her air and you leave _

_you keep your mind on yourself and lie the glass on the shelf _

_ After the heavenly speech your body throws holy heat_

_ the angels sing when our eyes meet_

But it was when he touched her that she forgot things like that. She just...fell into it. Into the way he made it feel special and different. Like she just wasn't another conquest on some long line of girls. She felt like she was just where she was supposed to be. And it empowered her. It changed her.   

_It wasn't a lie but it wasn't true _

_ I just wanted to make you feel good _

_ just wanted you near _

_I wasn't prepared I wasn't thinking of you_

_ that you could actually love me_

_ it never should have started_    

"I just....didn't think it would get here, Penny," he said, shuffling around her apartment.

"Get here? Where's here, Leonard? We don't go places, we don't do things, we just don't. What are you afraid of, huh?"

"Penny, we've been together three years-"

"Yeah, three damn years, Leonard, and we've been talking about moving in together for two of them. Have you even cracked a newspaper? No. Have you googled on your little computer and emailed me apartments? No. No, you're afraid of this, of us, of commitment."

"I'm not!"

"You're not, huh? Then where's my ring, huh? Where's the apartment? Where's the alone time? I don't see anything to prove you aren't afraid of making something more out of this. Why would you even tease me with saying you loved me, Leonard?"

_ She's dreaming back on the past _

_every opinion agreed_

_ doesn't know what to believe_

She locked him out. And told him she was done. So, he left, defeated, back across the hall to prying eyes and an anal-retentive Texan. She calls her mother and she says "Baby, you're better off without a man." She calls her sister who tells her to "get some rebound sex." Her friends invite her out for a Finally Single Again Party.

She cries on her couch instead.  

_ It must have been for a cause _

_ our lives have so many doors _

_ don't think about him anymore _

She heard Sheldon knock on her apartment door but refused to answer it. He knocked again. "Penny, open up or the bread will get cold." Her intrigue over that statement brought her to the door. "Oh, good. I didn't have the ingredients to make another loaf for you." He handed her a loaf of banana bread. She put it on the counter and opened her fridge.

"You want some, Sheldon?" He fidgeted and declined, saying he had to return to his apartment. "Thank you, Sheldon."

"You're welcome." He turned to leave.

"Sheldon!" he turned to face her again, hands clasped behind his back. "I'm sorry."

"Well, whatever for? You have done nothing to my person nor have you recently incurred any strikes or touched my things-"

"I'm sorry for the mess this must have caused in your life."

"Penny, I have no personal stake in this relationship other than the smug 'I told you so' I have already delivered to Leonard. In consequence, he bought home a cat." She smiled.  "The bread was for you to feel better."

"Thank you, Sheldon." She followed him to the door, wiping the moisture from her eyes. He turned and opened his mouth but she just smiled and filled it in for him. "'There, there, Penny', I already know." He looked at her for a moment before giving her a curt nod and going back to his apartment.  

_But it was the kiss,_

_ it took me away _

_ it's like he knew that I am fragile_

_ he handled me like glass_

_ and it hurts but it's what I deserve_

_ because I should have been more careful with the others that I handled_

_ I should have been I should have been _  

She was smearing butter on her second slice of bread when she heard her door open.  "I'm so sorry," Leonard said in a shattered voice. They rushed to each other's arms and she sobbed into his shoulder. "Friends?" And she smiled. And she knew.

_and knowing this I know that he'll get his_

_ but I don't want the man to suffer _

_ oh not the way I am_

_ because deep down I know that he's glass too_

_ but it really doesn't matter _

_until it's happening to you_

This is how this was always going to happen. This was always the result. No matter when or where or why or how, their relationship was always going to end like this. And she felt peace. Because she knew they had done all they could to make it work. And it didn't. It still hurt. It still hurt like hell. Because they were two broken people, trying to mend themselves separately. Trying to glue the shards of themselves back together.  But this was how it was going to be. And just like every thing else, this felt right. 

_everybody breaks _

_ everybody breaks _

_sometimes _

        


End file.
